Difficult Mothers Understanding and Overcoming Their Power

Author: Terri Apter
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393083926
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
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An essential work for readers seeking compassionate, wise guidance about the powerful relationship between mothers and their sons and daughters. Mother love is often seen as sacred, but for many children the relationship is a painful struggle. Using the newest research on human attachment and brain development, Terri Apter, an internationally acclaimed psychologist and writer, unlocks the mysteries of this complicated bond. She showcases the five different types of difficult mother—the angry mother, the controlling mother, the narcissistic mother, the envious mother, and the emotionally neglectful mother—and explains the patterns of behavior seen in each type. Apter also explores the dilemma at the heart of a difficult relationship: why a mother has such a powerful impact on us and why we continue to care about her responses long after we have outgrown our dependence. She then shows how we can conduct an “emotional audit” on ourselves to overcome the power of the complex feelings a difficult mother inflicts. In the end this book celebrates the great resilience of sons and daughters of difficult mothers as well as acknowledging their special challenges.

Difficult Mothers Understanding and Overcoming Their Power

Author: Terri Apter
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393081028
Format: PDF, Kindle
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Describes the five different types of difficult mothers, explains how adults can still suffer from negative relationships with their mothers, and how people can overcome the challenges of their complex feelings.

Difficult Mothers

Author: Terri Apter
Publisher: W. W. Norton
ISBN: 9780393345445
Format: PDF, ePub
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Describes the five different types of difficult mothers, explains how adults can still suffer from negative relationships with their mothers, and how people can overcome the challenges of their complex feelings.

How To Manage Your Mother

Author: Alyce-Faye Cleese
Publisher: Skyscraper Publications
ISBN: 1911072145
Format: PDF, ePub
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This book explores how different people have dealt with the issues related to getting on with their mothers. Psychotherapist Alyce-Faye Cleese interviewed a wide range of people to get an in-depth understanding of the different questions that arise in our relationships with our mother. From a New York taxi driver to her former husband John Cleese, and a computer consultant to General Colin Powell, the interviews show a remarkable similarity between the problems different people have with their mothers both alive and dead, and Alyce-Faye Cleese suggests a range of ways of dealing with problems that many of us share in one way or another.

You Don t Really Know Me Why Mothers and Daughters Fight and How Both Can Win

Author: Terri Apter
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 039328574X
Format: PDF, Mobi
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Understand what your teenage daughter really means—and learn to use your arguments to strengthen your bond with her. Mothers and teenage daughters argue more than any other child-parent pair—on average every two-and-a-half days. These quarrels, Terri Apter shows, are attempts to negotiate changes in a relationship that is valued by both mothers and daughters. A daughter often feels her mother doesn't know or understand her, and by fighting hopes to force her mother into a new awareness of who she really is, how she has changed, and what she is now capable of doing and understanding. But mothers often misinterpret their daughter's outbursts as signs of rejection, and they may pull back feeling hurt and confused. Through case studies and conversations between mothers and daughters, Apter shows mothers how to interpret the meanings behind a daughter's angry words and how to emerge from arguments with a new closeness.

Toxic Parents

Author: Susan Forward
Publisher: Bantam
ISBN: 0307575322
Format: PDF, ePub
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BONUS: This edition contains an excerpt from Dr. Susan Forward's Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them. When you were a child... Did your parents tell you were bad or worthless? Did your parents use physical pain to discipline you? Did you have to take care of your parents because of their problems? Were you frightened of your parents? Did your parents do anything to you that had to be kept secret? Now that you are an adult... Do your parents still treat you as if you were a child? Do you have intense emotional or physical reactions after spending time with your parents? Do your parents control you with threats or guilt? Do they manipulate you with money? Do you feel that no matter what you do, it's never good enough for your parents? In this remarkable self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward drawn on case histories and the real-life voices of adult children of toxic parents to help you free yourself from the frustrating patterns of your relationship with your parents -- and discover an exciting new world of self-confidence, inner strength, and emotional independence.

Passing Judgment Praise and Blame in Everyday Life

Author: Terri Apter
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393247864
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
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Terri Apter reveals how everyday judgments impact our relationships and how praise, blame, and shame shape our sense of self. Do you know that praise is essential to the growth of a healthy brain? That experiences of praise and blame affect how long we live? That the conscious and unconscious judgments we engage in every day began as a crucial survival technique? Do you think people shouldn’t be judgmental? But, how judgmental are you, and how does this impact your relationships? “Keenly perceptive” (The Atlantic) psychologist and writer Terri Apter reveals how everyday judgments impact our relationships, and how praise, blame, and shame shape our sense of self. Our obsession with praise and blame begins soon after birth. Totally dependent on others, rapidly we learn to value praise, and to fear the consequences of blame. Despite outgrowing an infant’s dependence, we continue to monitor others’ judgments of us, and we ourselves develop what relational psychologist Terri Apter calls a “judgment meter,” which constantly scans people and our interactions with them, and registers a positive or negative opinion. In Passing Judgment, Apter reveals how interactions between parents and children, within couples, and among friends and colleagues are permeated with praise and blame that range far beyond specific compliments and accusations. Drawing on three decades of research, Apter gives us the tools to learn about our personal needs, goals and values, to manage our biases, to tolerate others’ views, and to make sense of our most powerful, and often confusing, responses to ourselves and to others.

When You and Your Mother Can t Be Friends

Author: Victoria Secunda
Publisher: Delta
ISBN: 0307431304
Format: PDF, Kindle
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This, the first book ever to say that mother is not always a girl's best friend, is based on a landmark study of the mother-daughter relationships. Secunda offers breakthrough advice on understanding, and improving, what could be a woman's most critical relationship.

Difficult Mothers Adult Daughters

Author: Karen C.L. Anderson
Publisher: Mango Media Inc.
ISBN: 1633537161
Format: PDF
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Transform your relationship with your mother The best news on the planet is that your mother doesn't have to change in order for you to be happy. In fact, author Karen C.L. Anderson will take it a step further and say, your mother doesn't have to change in order for you to be free, peaceful, contented, and joyful. You can emotionally separate without guilt: Inspired by her own journey, Anderson's Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters: A Guide For Separation, Liberation & Inspiration shows women how to emotionally separate from their mothers without guilt and anxiety so they can finally create a life based on their own values, desires, needs, and preferences. Not to mention being able to like and respect themselves during the process. Learn through the experiences of others: Through personal stories and experiences, practical tools that can used right away to feel better, and journal prompts, Anderson compassionately leads women who struggle in their relationships with their mothers through a process of self-awareness and understanding. Anderson's work with hundreds of women and her own personal work have resulted in profound growth and transformation. Anderson knows the results are nothing short of miraculous. Funny and compassionate: This book is about Anderson discovering and accepting the whole of who she is (separate from her mother), and making her discoveries accessible to women struggling to redefine their challenging relationships with their mothers. Her writing is relatable, real, funny, and compassionate. What you'll learn inside this book: • Why mothers and daughters tend to have difficult relationships • How to heal and transform your mother "wounds" from sources of pain into sources of creativity and wisdom • How to tell your stories in a way that empowers you, rather than making you powerless • How to handle the uncomfortable emotions that seem inevitable when it comes to your relationship with your mother • The art of creating, articulating, and maintaining impeccable boundaries • How to stop "shoulding" when it comes to yourself and your mother • How to "re-mother" yourself and acknowledge, honor, and meet your own preferences and needs • And much, much more

What Do You Want from Me Learning to Get Along with In Laws

Author: Terri Apter
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 9780393072884
Format: PDF, Mobi
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Breaking new ground in family psychology, an exploration of the intricacy, friction, and love in the bonds between in-laws. When we marry, we believe the bond is between only two individuals. Few of us realize the power that inlaws will exert over our lives. But the in-laws we acquire when we marry affect our quality of life—our marriage, family, personal comfort, and long-term well-being—for better or worse. What Do You Want From Me? takes a fresh look at the age-old problem of managing conflict with in-laws, offering practical help for dealing with problems that are both immediate (“How do I deal with my in-laws now?”) and strategic (“How can I change the nature of my in-laws’ demands?”). Terri Apter, a psychologist whose books on family dynamics have received international acclaim, draws on nearly two decades of psychological research to pinpoint the sources of tension between in-laws and explore the ways in which we can build healthy relationships with the in-laws in our lives.